Kaitlyn Cey

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Prioritize People

A few weeks ago, I travelled to Edmonton to visit a dear friend. She is the kind of friend I can tell anything, call anytime and ask any questions. These friends are rare and I’m lucky to have her! During my visit, we played with her puppy and went on adventures with her new family and found only a short few minutes alone, to talk. I had a task on my mind, and chose to multi-task as my friend began to tell me about her life. I am sorry to admit, I picked up my cell phone and attempted to invite friends on Facebook to an upcoming event and listen to my friend simultaneously. She talked, I half-listened, the time passed – and soon we were off on our next adventure along with others. I completely missed the opportunity to connect with my friend. I favoured task completion over care and connection. Because I chose this, her and I both missed out on J O Y.

“You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” – Psalm 16:11

We can experience pleasure and joy in a few different ways. Christian Apologist John Piper describes this kind of joy saying, “We have fullness of joy in God when it outweighs all other competing emotions and overflows in love to others.”

God has literally wired us to experience deep and lasting joy when we choose to love. Author and psychology specialist Simon Senik teaches about the interplay between two brain chemicals, dopamine and oxytocin. When you check a task off your list, win a game or achieve something, dopamine is released. The problem is, this chemical is highly addictive and can result in addictions to cell phones, alcohol and social media. This pleasure is not a “fullness of joy” that will last, but instead works as a short and potentially addictive burst of pleasure.

Oxytocin, on the other hand, is the feeling of love, trust, friendship and relationship. Did you know that simply observing an act of generosity releases oxytocin in your brain? If you choose to act generously giving your time or energy, oxytocin is released. Writing a cheque or sending an email doesn’t have as strong as an effect.  When you choose to give your attention, time, energy, or effort to build connection and relationship with another human – oxytocin is released and it builds slowly over time.

If we constantly choose the short bursts of pleasure over the slow release of personal connections, joy seeps and we suffer. I chose this when I kept my attention fixed on my cell phone as my friend tried to connect with me.

Psychologist, Dr. Barbara L. Fredrickson, writes in her book, Love 2.0 How Our Supreme Emotion Affects Everything We Feel, Think, Do, and Become, says that love is not a “stable behemoth” but “micro-moments of connection between people.”

Our capacity to experience love and joy deeply affects our health. Fredrickson’s research also reveals that connection with others strengthens and enhances the health of our vagus nerve. This nerve starts at the stem of your brain and extends through your chest, connecting the brain to the lungs, digestive tract, and most remarkably, your heart.

Your relationship with God grows in much the same way – and building your love of Him builds oxytocin in your brain, too. It’s no wonder Paul emphatically and relentlessly directs believers to think about the implications of the resurrected Christ. Ah, yes. This is the Gospel, the Good News… And good news always leads to joy.

What is the resurrection?

THE POWERFUL POSITION OF CHRIST

The reality that “Jesus was appointed the Son of God in power by his resurrection from the dead: Jesus Christ our Lord.” – Romans 1:4

What is the implication?

YOUR POWERFUL POSITION IN CHRIST

The reality that “Through him we received grace and apostleship to call all the Gentiles to the obedience that comes from faith …” – Romans 1:5

Will you choose to set aside micromoments throughout your day to connect deeply with this reality? To connect deeply with God? And to connect deeply with people?

Where to start?

Set a reminder in your phone to acknowledge the powerful position of Christ, and your powerful position in Christ at midday for one week.
You are always one thought away from victory.

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